I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
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