Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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