I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize