i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
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