you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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