It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
