I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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