He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
He kissed a someone with a penis
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Randomize
