Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize