how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
