Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Randomize
