so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
