he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize
