If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I went to an adult Halloween party last night dressed as Mrs. Doubtfire, but I woke up on a stranger's couch surrounded by sleeping children in karate gi's. And I accidentally flushed my granny wig mid-puke, so if they wake up I'm gonna have to convince them that I'm just a weird older man and not a terrible cross dresser.
How did you come to this point in your life?
Good bartenders.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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