Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
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