he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
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