OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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