So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
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