Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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