Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
