haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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