You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
