ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
