Will you blow on my dice?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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