He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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