If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
