glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
