Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
