i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
sick fucks of a feather flock together
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
