everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
In America we eat man semen.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
