no, he came in my armpit
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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