How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
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