I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize