I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
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