home. puking in laundry basket.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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