There is no way he is gay with that hair.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
