I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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