Who did Billy Mays play for?
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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