I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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