I could have mohawked her pubes.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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