Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
