If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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