That's when you crack a 10am beer
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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