You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
