Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Randomize
