We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
My vagina is very pro this idea
FUCK WHALES
Randomize
