im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
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