just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize