Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
