A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Randomize
